How Can I Find My Father?

Going through your whole life not knowing your real dad can create a massive void that a birth mother or adoptive parents are unable to fill.

According to data, around 18 million children grow up without a father. From adoption to abuse and abandonment, various reasons could be behind a child being separated from their dad. But at some point, it’s natural to start wondering who he is, what he is like, and what it would be like to share a conversation with him.

If you want to find your biological father, this article is for you. We discuss proven ways for you to discover more information and hopefully meet him in person. 

How to Find My Father

Before you begin the search process, it’s important to prepare yourself for what is to follow. Finding your dad could be an unexpectedly long journey that is arduous and emotionally straining.

Therefore, you need to ensure you’re mentally prepared for it and understand what you aim to achieve at the end of it.

For instance, do you want to just find information or meet your estranged father in person? What would change by doing this? Are you prepared to forgive him for being absent from your life? How would he react? Would he want to meet you? Can you handle the disappointment if he refuses to communicate? How would others in your family, such as adopted parents and half-siblings, react?

Remember, what you find at the end of the search might not be the outcome you expected. Your dad could have his own children and family now. Your relationship with your biological mother or adopted family could also change if he walks into your life.

So, before you do anything, consider what you want and the possible outcomes. If you’re convinced you’re up for it, here are practical steps to kick-start your father search.

Speak to Your Birth Mother and Family

Your biological mother and close relatives will likely have information that could provide a few clues to your biological dad.

For instance, they could share a name, city, and high school or photos, postcards, and other documents to help with your search.

These may not be enough to track down your father. But at least they could lead you to a family member of your father’s birth family.

And if you’re adopted, see whether the parents who raised you can get you access to the original birth certificate and adoption records.

Research Online Resources on Google

Once you gather all the information, you can next head online. Nowadays, everyone has a digital footprint, and the best way to locate digital data is by using Google’s search engine.

Searching for a name alone on Google will seem like finding a needle in a haystack. To improve your hit rate, you must include as much information as possible as keywords.

For instance, type a location, school, or workplace together with your dad’s name. When you only know his high school and graduating year, search them online to see whether you could find a class yearbook.

Post a Message on Facebook and X

Facebook and X (formerly Twitter) are excellent platforms for finding unknown paternity information.

Apart from searching their profiles and content, you can also make use of their massive user community consisting of over 3 billion people globally.

For example, let your connections and followers know about the search for your biological dad and request their support to uncover details.

There could also be special communities within these platforms that help people get in touch with their birth parents. Finding and joining some of them could be worthwhile, too. 

Search Public Records on Nuwber

There could be thousands of public records out there carrying information about your father. Instead of accessing them through individual organizations, you can use Nuwber to get a compiled report with a single search.

Nuwber is a people search platform that gathers data from public sources, such as federal and local databases and networking sites.

To find records on it, you will need your father’s first and last name, phone number, address, or email. If you don’t have any of those details, you can use the platform to find the contact information of others who could lead you to your dad.

Take a DNA Test

DNA testing is a popular method for digging deeper into a person’s biological family history.

The regular DNA tests most people take are home kits that provide insights into your ethnicity and geographic origins.

Many can even provide a DNA match list based on your results. This generally includes details of others who have taken the test and share DNA matches with you. These shared matches can link you to people in your family you haven’t met or are unaware of. Who knows, there’s a chance your biological father might be on it, too.

Hire a PI

If you’re struggling to trace the whereabouts of your dad, getting professional help could be your best option for finding information. For this, you need the services of a private investigator.

However, when hiring someone, ensure they come recommended, preferably by someone you know.

Check their credentials and success rate. Don’t forget to discuss their fees before you share your father’s details with them. 

To Recap

Thanks to advanced technology, there are several techniques available today to find your biological father with little to no information.

When starting your search, speak to your family members, close relatives, and friends to check what they remember and can share with you.

Then, use what you find to research online resources using Google. Seeking community support on Facebook and X and searching Nuwber’s people database are other methods to consider.

A DNA test is another useful option. It can lead you to biological relatives by identifying close matches to your DNA markers, provided others in your family have taken the same test.

If all else fails, hiring a professional PI can be a good idea. Although they’re often expensive, private investigators could speed up the search process using their contacts and sleuthing experience.

FAQ

What are the common reasons for a person to not know their birth father?

An individual could be separated from their real dad at a young age in a variety of circumstances. The most common is adoption, in which case they would likely not know both their birth parents.

In some instances, a biological mother might take her little girl or boy away from their father to avoid abuse or some other harmful experience or environment, such as war.

There’s also the possibility that the bio mom doesn’t know who the father is or hasn’t told the biological dad that they have a child.

Why would someone want to locate their biological father?

For many people, it’s about seeking closure. Growing up not aware of the birth dad can create a massive void in a person’s life. They may have lots of unanswered questions and, at times, may long to seek acceptance from their biological parents.

So, it’s natural for them to explore their roots and learn more about their family history on the paternal side.

Tracing back hereditary conditions, such as heart disease and Alzheimer’s, could also lead a person to search for their real father.

How do I confirm whether someone is my genetic father?

While historical timelines could help identify your father, having some form of biological confirmation can give you better reassurance.

Of course, many children inherit facial and other appearance-related features from their biological parents. But in many situations, this won’t be enough to draw a conclusion.

The best way to find out the truth is through paternity DNA test results. These usually indicate the “probability of paternity” as 0% or 99.9%. However, to get the DNA results, you need the relevant person’s permission to get a cheek swab or blood.

What is the easiest way to build my family tree?

To begin the process, you must first gather information that could help you trace back your family history.

This can include birth certificates, obituary notices, newspaper articles, letters, photos, and the like referring to anyone related to you—from your first cousin and half brother to great grandparents and other relatives.

You can then get help from tools like Ancestry and FamilySearch that allow people to design family trees using genetic genealogy. Once you enter what you already know and have, they can search and suggest records and ancestors that could potentially fit into your family tree. Many of these platforms also have searchable libraries of historical databases.

Will an adoption agency disclose the details of a biological parent?

In general, an adoption agency will disclose limited information, the extent of which could vary depending on state legislation.

When there’s a closed adoption arrangement, the agency may usually reveal medical and similar non-identifying information about the birth parents. No identifiable records, such as names and contact details, are shared between the biological and adoptive parents and the adoptee.

However, at an adoptee’s request, the agency might agree to reach out to the birth father and mother to check whether they’re willing to provide their information.

Related Posts